100+ Side-Splitting Monday Puns to Kickstart Your Week with Laughter!

Monday Puns

Are you dreading the start of the week? Well, we've got over 100 Monday puns that will turn those Monday blues into Monday "shoes"! From coffee woes to office woes, these puns will have you laughing your way through the most dreaded day of the week. Get ready to kickstart your week with some hilarious and witty jokes that will have you rolling with laughter. Whether you're a Monday hater or just looking for a good chuckle, these puns will definitely brighten up the start of your week. So grab a cup of coffee, put on your best Monday "shoes," and get ready to tackle Monday with a smile on your face and a pun in your heart!

Marvelous Monday Puns

  • Why don't we ever tell secrets on a Monday? Because IT's the start of the weak!
  • Monday is like a Math problem. Add the irritation, subtract the Motivation, divide the Energy, and multiply the stress!
  • Do you know what happened to the guy who started a diet on Monday? He said, "I'm on a seefood diet. I see Food and I eat it... especially on Mondays!"
  • Monday is the day that falls right in "between" the Weekend and the next weekend, making it the "between-the-weekend" day!
  • Why don't we trust Stairs on Mondays? Because they're always up to something!
  • Monday is the day when even my Coffee needs coffee!
  • What do you call a sad coffee on a Monday? Depresso!
  • Why did the Calendar go to Therapy? Because it had too many "Mondays"!
  • Why don't we ever play hide and seek with Mondays? Because they always hide, but they never seek to leave!
  • Monday is like a math problem. You either solve it or resign yourself to the fact that it's unsolvable!

Swiftly Funny Monday Puns

  • I lost my job at the calendar factory because I took a day off on Monday. It was a Terrible weekday.
  • The math Teacher couldn't control her class on Monday. It was a Fractional problem.
  • My Friend opened a Bakery on a Monday. She kneaded a fresh start.
  • When I ask my Dog about his favorite day, he always says Monday. It's his muttering day.
  • The Dentist was feeling down on Monday. He had a frownday.
  • My friend tried to sell me a Car on Monday. It was a Wheeling Good deal.
  • I tried to do Laundry on Monday, but the washing machine was acting up. It was a spinning Headache.
  • I accidentally spilled coffee on my laptop on a Monday. It was grounds for a brewhaha.
  • My friend was telling a joke on Monday, but I didn't laugh. It was a groanday.
  • The Magician's act on Monday was a flop. It was a trickle disaster.

Historical Puns

  • Why did Joan of Arc hate Mondays? Because they were always a Pain in the Joan!
  • Did you hear about the ancient Egyptian King who hated Mondays? His Name was Toth-tally fed up!
  • What did George Washington say when he saw his calendar on Monday? "I cannot tell a Monday!"
  • Why did Cleopatra dislike Mondays? Because they always made her feel pharaoh-cious!
  • How did Julius Caesar feel about Mondays? He thought they were just too "Et tu, Brute-al."
  • Why did the Mona Lisa frown on Mondays? Because she couldn't Paint the "Mondaysa Lisa"!
  • What did King Arthur say when he woke up on Monday? "I'm sorry, I must be a Knight-mare!"
  • Why did the Roman emperor refuse to Work on Mondays? Because he believed in "Carpe Diem, Not Carpe Monday!"
  • What did the Mayans say every Monday? "I Hope this isn't the end of the week!"
  • Why did the ancient Greek Philosopher hate Mondays? Because he couldn't find any Socratic method to make them better!

Manic Monday Puns

  • Why did the calendar get a promotion? It had too many dates on Monday!
  • What do you call a sleepy day of the week? Yawnday!
  • How does a Monday feel when it's feeling down? Blue-sday!
  • What did the Hat say to the Monday? You're on top of my Head!
  • Why don't we tell secrets on Mondays? Because they're not good at keeping them under wraps!
  • What does a Monday do at the Beach? It gets tide down!
  • How does a Monday Exercise? It runs out of Time!
  • What's a Monday's favorite accessory? Its snooze Button!
  • Why don't Mondays go to the movies? They Can't handle the "drama"!
  • What did the calendar say to Monday? I'm always hanging around!

Double Entendre Puns

  • Why did the calendar go on a diet? Because it heard Mondays had too many dates!
  • What did the Monday say to the weekend? "I'm always here to start your week with a pun-ch!"
  • Why did the Scarecrow hate Mondays? Because they were a real drag, just like his job!
  • What did the Music teacher say on Monday? "It's time to Face the music and start the week on a high note!"
  • What did the Monday say to the coffee? "I'm here to perk you up, One sip at a time!"
  • Why did the Monday go to the Gym? To work on its "mon-dates"!
  • What did the Monday say to the Toaster? "Let's Toast to a pun-tastic start of the week!"
  • Why did the Monday get a promotion? Because it always "mon-ders" ahead!
  • What did the Monday say to the alarm Clock? "Rise and shine, it's time for a pun-filled day!"
  • Why did the Monday bring a Ladder to work? To climb over the "mon-dane" tasks!

Marvelous Monday Puns

  • Why did the calendar Break Up with Monday? It was tired of all the dates.
  • Monday is like a math problem. Add a Bed, subtract the motivation, divide the energy, and you get zero.
  • Did you hear about the guy who lost his job at the calendar factory? He took a Monday off.
  • Monday is the day that falls right between "I can't believe it's Monday again" and "Is it Friday yet?"
  • What did the hat say to Monday? "You're on top of my list of least favorite days."
  • Why don't we tell secrets on Mondays? Because they're hard to keep under wraps!
  • Monday is the day that feels like the snooze button on life's alarm clock.
  • Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field of Monday jokes.
  • What did the coffee say to Monday? "Don't blend in, stand out like me!"
  • Monday is like a math problem. Subtract the Fun, divide the energy, and you're left with a problem.

Funky Monday Puns

  • I tried to catch a Fish on Monday, but I only got the "monday blues."
  • Why did the calendar go to therapy? It had a case of "mondayitis."
  • What do you call a Monday that acts like a Tuesday? A "fun-day!"
  • Why did the scarecrow hate Mondays? Because they were always "Hay-ting" him!
  • Why did the Tomato turn Red on Monday? It saw the Salad dressing and got "dressed" for the occasion!
  • What did the Monday say to the weekend? "You're just two days away from being "mon-daze!"
  • Why did the Bicycle Fall over on Monday? It was "tired" of the work week!
  • What do you call a Monday that's always late? "Tardy Monday-dy!"
  • Why was the math Book sad on Monday? It had too many "problems" to solve!
  • Why did the Banana go to the Doctor on Monday? It wasn't "peeling" well!

Marvelous Monday Spoonerism Puns

Funny Anagram Puns

  • A crummy Monday is just a "damp Run" away!
  • Feeling down on Monday? Just remember, it's a "dynamo pun" waiting to happen!
  • Forget the Monday blues, turn it into a "dumbly pun" day!
  • Monday mornings May be rough, but you can always turn them into a "Yarn dump" of laughter!
  • Don't let Monday get you down, it's just a "dumpy ran" in the grand scheme of things!
  • Make Monday your "darn mopy" day and Watch the laughter flow!
  • Monday blues? Turn it around with a "proud Yam" of puns!
  • Don't let Monday drag you down, it's just a "yarn dump" waiting to be unraveled!
  • Monday may be tough, but it's also an "up and mod" opportunity for pun-filled fun!
  • Embrace the "damp run" of Monday and turn it into a laughter-filled "pun mad" day!

Side-Splitting Situational Puns

  • Why did the calendar feel sad on Monday? It had a case of the "monday blues."
  • Why did the scarecrow dread Mondays? It was always "outstanding" in its field!
  • Why did the math teacher Love Mondays? It was his favorite day for "sum" fun!
  • Why did the golfer hate Mondays? Every Shot was a "hole" lot worse!
  • Why did the Chef dislike Mondays? It was always a "recipe" for disaster!
  • Why did the Baker enjoy Mondays? It was the perfect day for "Rolling" out some Dough!
  • Why did the musician loathe Mondays? It was a constant battle with the "blues!"
  • Why did the Computer programmer dread Mondays? It was always a "Code" red!
  • Why did the Detective dislike Mondays? It was a "mystery" why they kept happening!
  • Why did the Gardener love Mondays? It was the ideal day to "Plant" some positivity!