100+ Boozy and Hilarious Alcohol Puns to Get You Punny-Drunk!

Alcohol Puns

Are you ready to raise your spirits and have a barrel of laughs? Look no further because we've concocted over 100 alcohol puns that will leave you feeling merlot-ted with laughter. From wine-ing about life to getting on the gin-credible side of humor, these puns will take you on a wild and tipsy journey through the world of alcoholic beverages. So grab a pint, raise your glasses, and prepare for a night full of brew-tiful and whiskey business. Whether you're a beer connoisseur or a wine aficionado, these puns will definitely quench your thirst for laughter. So sit back, relax, and get ready to cheers your way into the hilarious and intoxicating world of alcohol puns. Cheers!

Cheers to the Best Boozy Wordplay Puns

  • What do you call a drunk mathematician? A square root.
  • Why did the bartender get arrested? For serving Time.
  • What do you call a Beer that's always in a good mood? A Hop-timist.
  • Why did the wine Glass go to the doctor? It was feeling a little corked up.
  • What do you call a drunk who's always getting into fights? A punch-drunk.
  • Why did the beer get a job at the Brewery? Because it was a lager than life personality.
  • What do you call a drunk who's always trying to impress people? A show-off.
  • Why did the vodka bottle get a speeding ticket? Because it was over the limit.
  • What do you call a drunk who's always getting lost? A rum-bled.
  • Why did the beer can get a promotion? Because it was a top-shelf performer.

Tom Swifty's Alcohol Puns

  • Tom Swifty said, "I'm all tapped out," after he finished his beer.
  • Tom Swifty said, "I'm feeling a little bubbly," after he drank a glass of Champagne.
  • Tom Swifty said, "I'm feeling a little tipsy," after he had one too many cocktails.
  • Tom Swifty said, "I'm feeling a little under the influence," after he had a few drinks.
  • Tom Swifty said, "I'm feeling a little wasted," after he drank a whole bottle of wine.
  • Tom Swifty said, "I'm feeling a little hungover," after he had a big night of drinking.
  • Tom Swifty said, "I'm feeling a little dehydrated," after he drank too much beer.
  • Tom Swifty said, "I'm feeling a little sick," after he drank too many Shots.
  • Tom Swifty said, "I'm feeling a little dizzy," after he drank too much alcohol.
  • Tom Swifty said, "I'm feeling a little out of it," after he drank too much alcohol.

Historical Puns About Alcohol

  • Why did the ancient Egyptian refuse to drink beer? Because he didn't want to be a "mummy" in the morning!
  • What did the medieval Knight say after a few drinks? "I'm feeling quite joust-y now!"
  • How did the Roman Philosopher justify his love for wine? "In vino veritas - in wine, there is truth."
  • Why did the Pirate refuse to drink rum? Because he didn't want to "mar" his reputation!
  • What did the ancient Greek say after too much wine? "I'm feeling grape!"
  • Why did the Viking refuse to drink mead? He said, "I prefer my battles without the mead-y distraction!"
  • What did the pharaoh say after a night of drinking? "I need to pyramid-scheme my way to feeling better!"
  • Why did the medieval King enjoy ale so much? He said, "It's the only thing that keeps me throne!"
  • How did the Roman emperor justify his wine consumption? "All roads lead to Rome, and they're paved with vineyards!"
  • Why did the samurai refuse to drink sake? He said, "I must keep a clear mind for the art of the blade!"

Pour Some Laughs: Alcohol Puns

  • I'm not drunk, I'm just grape at puns!
  • I'm a beer-y funny person, don't you think?
  • Wine not enjoy a good pun or two?
  • I'll whiskey you a good joke if you let me!
  • Let's raise the Bar with these puns!
  • Tequila mockingbird is singing some puns!
  • Vodka-ing for a friend who appreciates puns!
  • Rum-ember, puns are the key to a good time!
  • I'm on a gin-ius level when it comes to puns!
  • Let's make pour decisions and enjoy some puns!

Double Entendre Alcohol Puns

  • What do you call a beer that's always happy? A hoppy beer!
  • What do you call a wine that's always getting into trouble? A Riesling in the slammer!
  • What do you call a martini that's always losing its way? A lost martini!
  • What do you call a vodka that's always making people laugh? A funny vodka!
  • What do you call a rum that's always getting into fights? A rowdy rum!
  • What do you call a tequila that's always making people dance? A Fiesta tequila!
  • What do you call a whiskey that's always making people sleepy? A sleepy whiskey!
  • What do you call a beer that's always making people sing? A singing beer!
  • What do you call a wine that's always making people cry? A crying wine!
  • What do you call a martini that's always making people fall asleep? A sleepy martini!

Paronomasia Puns

  • What do you call a beer that's always getting into trouble? A brew-tal offender.
  • What do you call a wine that's always being tapped? A cask-a-holic.
  • What do you call a vodka that's always getting lost? A wandering spirit.
  • What do you call a tequila that's always making people laugh? A shot-up comedian.
  • What do you call a rum that's always getting into fights? A rum-brawler.
  • What do you call a whiskey that's always getting into trouble? A dram-atic offender.
  • What do you call a beer that's always making people dance? A hop-timistic brew.
  • What do you call a wine that's always getting into trouble? A cork-y character.
  • What do you call a vodka that's always getting into fights? A punch-drunk spirit.
  • What do you call a tequila that's always getting lost? A wandering spirit.

Rhyming Alcohol Puns

  • What do you call a drunk mosquito? A buzzy body.
  • What do you call a drunk bee? A buzz kill.
  • What do you call a drunk penguin? A wobbly bird.
  • What do you call a drunk fish? A sea-sick.
  • What do you call a drunk kangaroo? A hopped-up hopper.
  • What do you call a drunk elephant? A tipsy tusker.
  • What do you call a drunk giraffe? A wobbly Neck.
  • What do you call a drunk monkey? A swinging swinger.
  • What do you call a drunk lion? A roaring drunk.
  • What do you call a drunk snake? A slithering sloshed.

Top 10 Alcohol Puns: Spoonerism Edition

  • I'm a little distill, so I'll have a whis-key.
  • I'm feeling gin-credible, let's have a dale of wine.
  • I'm vodka my brain for a pun, but it's a real shot in the daiquiri.
  • Tequila me, but I think I'm getting beer-itated.
  • Rum away with me to the winery, it's grape fun!
  • Let's have a brew-haha and mix a few cocktails.
  • Margarita me, but I'm feeling a bit martini.
  • Wine not join me for a sip and a giggle, it's a Barrel of laughs!
  • Whiskey Business is my middle name, cheers to that!
  • Let's champagne and dance the night away, it's bub-alecious!

Amusing Anagram Alcohol Puns

  • Rum - Mur
  • Whiskey - Key Wish
  • Tequila - Quiet Ale
  • Vodka - Ovadk
  • Gin - Ing
  • Beer - Bree
  • Wine - We in
  • Cider - Cried
  • Champagne - Mean Chaps
  • Sake - Skea

Fizzing with Puns: Alcohol Edition

  • Why did the beer go to therapy? It had too many hops and couldn't bottle up its emotions!
  • What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
  • Why did the cocktail refuse to socialize? It always felt too mixed up in the crowd!
  • Why did the whiskey need a Vacation? It was tired of being on the rocks all the time!
  • What did the martini say to the bartender? "You olive me and that's vermouth!"
  • Why did the wine get a promotion? It was grape at its job!
  • What did the vodka say to the tequila? "You're the salt to my shot glass!"
  • Why did the beer feel so lucky? It always had a four-Leaf Clover in its hops!
  • What did the champagne bottle say at the Party? "I'm here to pop bottles and have a sparkling good time!"
  • Why did the rum go to the beach? It wanted to get a little tropical vacation!