Get ready to laugh until you're crying with our collection of 100+ crying puns that will have you weeping with joy! From tear-jerkingly funny to puns that'll make you sob with laughter, we've got it all. Whether you're feeling a little weepy or just in the mood for some pun-derful humor, these puns will have you in stitches. So grab a tissue and get ready to dive into the world of crying puns that will leave you laughing so hard, you might just shed a tear. It's time to embrace the pun-derful world of crying puns and let the laughter flow!
Crying Puns
- Why did the kleenex Dance? Because IT had a Little boogie in it!
- What do you call a fake Noodle? An impasta!
- Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts.
- What do you get when you cross a Snowman and a Vampire? Frostbite.
- I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a Hug.
- What did One Toilet say to the other toilet? You look flushed!
- What does a Cloud wear under his raincoat? Thunderwear.
- What did the big flower say to the little flower? "Hey, bud!"
- Why Can't you give Elsa a Balloon? Because she will let it go.
- Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
Crying Puns - Swiftly Humorous Puns
- “I dropped my Ice cream,” Tom cried softly.
- “I can't find my Phone,” Tom sobbed dial-emma.
- “I'm Terrible at Gardening,” Tom wept root-lessly.
- “I lost my Pet Mouse,” Tom squeaked tearfully.
- “I broke my Pencil,” Tom drawled sadly.
- “I can't stop sneezing,” Tom sniffled uncontrollably.
- “I missed my Flight,” Tom sighed Plane-fully.
- “I can't open this jar,” Tom whined tightly.
- “I can't remember the punchline,” Tom joked tearfully.
- “I'm out of Coffee,” Tom moaned perk-less-ly.
Historical Puns
- Why did Napoleon cry? Because he had a Bonapart!
- What did Alexander the Great say when he couldn't stop crying? "I guess I'm just too great at tears!"
- Why did Joan of Arc cry at the battle? She was feeling burnt out!
- What did George Washington say when he couldn't hold Back his tears? "I cannot tell a lie, these tears are real!"
- Why did Cleopatra cry when she saw the Sphinx? It was a real tear-jerker!
- How did Julius Caesar express his emotions? By shedding Ro-man-tears!
- Why did Christopher Columbus cry when he discovered America? He had a real "Sea" of emotions!
- What did Abraham Lincoln say when he couldn't stop crying? "Four score and seven tears ago..."
- Why did Marie Antoinette cry when she lost her Head? She felt like a real Basket case!
- What did Leonardo da Vinci say when his Painting made him cry? "It's a real Work of 'Art'!"
Laugh Your Tears Away with These Crying Puns!
- Why did the tissue go to Therapy? It had too many issues!
- What do you call a crying Herb? A-Sage-tear!
- Why did the Onion cry during the Movie? It was a real tear-jerker!
- What do you get when you cross a Waterfall with a comedian? A "stand-up" Shower!
- Why did the Ocean cry? Because it got caught in a "current" affair!
- What did the tissue say to the crying Baby? "Blow me away!"
- Why did the Tomato turn Red and cry? It saw the Salad dressing!
- What did the tear say to the Eye? "I'm Falling for you!"
- Why did the raindrop cry? Because it heard thunder "cracking" jokes!
- Why did the comedian cry during their performance? They couldn't "stand" the silence!
Double Entendre Puns - Crying Puns
- Why did the tissue go to therapy? It had emotional issues to blow.
- Did you hear about the sad onion? It cried its eyes out, but it's still a-peeling.
- Why did the tear refuse to go on a Date? It didn't want to get emotionally attached.
- What did the Water say to the crying eye? "Don't be salty, just let it flow."
- Why did the tear become a stand-up comedian? It wanted to make people laugh and cry at the same Time.
- What do you call a baby who cries while playing hide-and-seek? A tear-rorist.
- Why did the tissue take up Boxing? It wanted to be able to punch sadness away.
- Why was the River sad? It couldn't find its way back to the sea and was feeling all washed up.
- What did the crying Candle say to the Flame? "I'm just melting with emotions."
- Why did the tear take a day off? It needed a tear-rible break.
Crying Puns
- When the sad onion started shedding tears, it was a real tearjerker!
- The comedian's jokes were so Bad, they made the audience cry... with laughter!
- My Friend started a Business selling tissues for crying occasions; it's a real sob story.
- Why did the kleenex Break Up with the tissue? It just couldn't handle the emotional baggage.
- What do you call a crying Computer? A Dell with emotions.
- I told my wife she was Drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised and then started crying.
- Why did the Lemon start weeping? It realized its zest for life was fading away.
- The broken pencil started crying because it felt pointless.
- Why did the Calendar start crying? Its days were numbered.
- When the tomato couldn't stop crying, it turned into a real saucy mess.
Crying Puns
- Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
- What did the big flower say to the little flower? "What's up, bud?"
- Why can't you give Elsa a balloon? Because she will let it go!
- What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the Closet? "Supplies!"
- Why did the Bicycle Fall over? Because it was two-tired!
- What do you call a Bear with no Teeth? A Gummy Bear!
- Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one!
- Did you hear about the kidnapping at the playground? They woke up!
- Why did the Scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
- Why did the coffee file a Police report? It got mugged!
Funny Spoonerism Puns About Crying
- Why did the tear cry? Because it was a weepy story!
- What did the sobbing onion say? "I'm peeling sad!"
- Why did the raindrop feel down? It was feeling droopy!
- What did the teardrop Study? Cry-ence!
- Why did the tissue need therapy? It had emotional issues!
- Why did the tear become an Artist? It wanted to Paint a sad Picture!
- What do you call a crying Bull? A tear-ible snorter!
- Why did the tear go to the Gym? It wanted to work on its cry-ceps!
- What did the emotional cloud say? "I'm feeling misty-eyed!"
- Why did the tear join a Band? It wanted to be a sob-Rock Star!
Crying Puns - Anagram Puns
Funny Situational Puns
- Why did the tissue go to therapy? It had too many issues to blow.
- Did you hear about the onion that made everyone cry? It was a real tear-jerker!
- Why did the river start crying? Because it couldn't find its way back to the sea.
- What do you call a crying Vegetable? A sob-cumber!
- Why did the Clock start weeping? It had too many seconds to tick off.
- What did the sad Tennis Ball say? "I'm feeling deflated."
- Why did the painting start sobbing? It felt framed for a Crime it didn't commit.
- Why did the sad Book cry? It had too many tear-jerk chapters.
- What did the depressed cloud say? "I'm feeling Rain-diculously low."
- Why did the sad Math book cry? It had too many problems to solve.